the curse of the second child

As much as I swore it wouldn't happen, Kynlea suffers from 2nd child syndrome. It's first obvious when you walk into our home and see a mini shrine to Emi, and only a few pictures of Kynlea (usually the professional, matted, huge ones-because we were trying to make up for the fact that it had been a year since her last picture). Every month, or in some cases week, of Emi's first 5 years of life is documented in pictures...Kynlea, not so much. I could easily say this is because Emi loves getting pictures and Kynlea hates it, but there is more proof.

By the time Emi was 2, she was already in a dance class, by 3, she was taking three of them. She's also in soccer. Kynlea is three and has yet to be enrolled in anything. We are so stinking busy with Tyler and Emi, I can't even find the time to get Kyns signed up, let alone to a practice or a game.

But most telling is just by looking at her. Emi never left the house without a bow in her perfectly brushed hair, and earrings that matched her perfectly coordinated and ironed outfit. I'm lucky if Kynlea gets her face washed and her teeth brushed some mornings!

Here's how things have changed:
Emi-always had cute, matching clothes, with zippers and buttons, with no thought to how difficut it is to get her in and out of said outfit...Kynlea-is lucky to get pants that match her shirt, and long gone are any zippers.
Emi-I would buy $30 jeans and not bat an eye, even though I knew she would outgrow them in 3 months...Kynlea-I wait for a 2 for $22 sale at Childrens place, even though she's been the same size for over a year.
Every morning Emi's clothes were perfectly ironed...Kynlea is lucky if hers come off a hanger.
Emi-had earrings that matched her outfit every day...Kynlea is still wearing the studs that her ears were pierced with three years ago.
Emi had the best selection of shoes...Kyns has tinkerbelle AND ariel flipflops
Emi had at least a zillion bows....Ok, so does Kynlea-in this area I haven't slacked

I had this epipahny this morning as I was picking out Kynlea's clothes for the day and stumbled upon a hand me down skirt from Emi that needed to be ironed. I wondered if Kynlea would grow up feeling neglected and think that I don't care as much as I did when Emi was little. And then I thought, it's not so much a case of caring less, but more about deciding what is really important this time around. Granted, Kynlea doesn't always look like a Gymboree poster child, but she is still loved like crazy and I haven't slacked on the quality things. So when she grows up and asks why there are no pictures of her or why she doesn't have a ton of baby earrings to pass on to her girls, I will tell her that I was more secure in being a mom this time around and worried less about the details, and instead focused on just enjoying the small amount of time we have together before I have to send her out into the world.

And just for today, I ironed the skirt and she's wearing it-even though her earrings and shoes don't match :-D